An e-zine for writers and those who love great writing.
ADD SPICE TO YOUR TAG
by Ronald Wayne Jones
A WRITER'S GUIDE TO INCOME TAXES
by James G. Rogers, C.P.A.
THE PERFECT DENTIST
A Short Story by Robert Nailor
FIGHTING THE COMPUTER VIRUS: SAFE-SEX IN THE COMPUTER WORLD
by Mitchel Whitington
In August of 1995 I
attended a writing workshop in Albuquerque taught by Thomas V. Kappel. In those
few hours he changed forever how I write. It's only fitting I pass along a few
tidbits of his sage advice in the hope it falls on fertile ground.
The objective of every
writer must be to make his words come alive and play like an episode of Star
Wars flashed across the screen of our reader's mind. At the same time most of
our teachers instruct us to use phrases like "he said" or "she
said" to explain who is delivering our dialog. They tell us that these
speaking tags will fade invisibly into the background. True as this may be, any
novice seaman will tell you don't anchor a sailboat to a single piling. Besides,
the last thing we need is for our writing to sink into the mud of obscurity.
The best way to explain
this is with an example. Raw dialogue using standard tag lines might sound
something like this:
"They say his dog is
as big as a horse, and eats kids for breakfast," Tony said.
"Dogs don't get that
big." Gina looked at Tony. "That ball cost five bucks. You hit it over
the fence so it's up to you to fetch it. I told you we shouldn't play so close
to old man Iverson's back yard."
"Okay," Tony
said.
His friends followed as
Tony walked to the fence. Then they watched him climb it to disappear over top.
A moment later they heard Tony say, "Run for your lives!"
A second afterwards Tony
climbed the fence followed by the dog.
Now, compare this with
the same dialogue using action, color, and detail to add flavor and meaning.
"They say his
dog is as big as a horse, and eats kids for breakfast." Tony paled as his
voice wavered. The toe of his right sneaker cut a figure eight into the packed
clay.
"Dogs don't get that
big." The red-haired Gina flashed the younger Tony a challenge as she
stared down her freckled nose. "That ball cost five bucks. You hit it over
the fence so it's up to you to fetch it. I told you we shouldn't play so close
to old man Iverson's yard."
"Okay." Tony
swallowed his fear. This was the final insult. It was one thing to be challenged
and another to be dared by a girl in front of the whole neighborhood.
His friends trailed at as
safe distance as Tony marched to the fence. A few whispered among themselves as
he climbed the rotting wood and disappeared over top. A moment later they heard
Tony's scream. "Run for your lives!"
A second later Tony vaulted
the fence with the ball clutched in his white-knuckled fist. A monstrous Great
Dane crashed through the slats inches from his heels. With slobber splattering
the dusty ground with every bound, the monster barked at the scattering quail as
they fled into the neighborhood.
The differences in this
example demonstrate what emotion and color add to dialogue.
If you study the novels
of these same teachers who advise us to stick with he or she said, you'd be
lucky to find two such tag lines on a typical page. We should follow their
example, not chisel what they say into marble tablets. The dilemma's solution is
to use tag lines that add action, detail, tone, or body language while
identifying our speaker.
Take the time to examine
several random pages written by your favorite modern author and see how he
handles his speaking tags. Remember that action and even emotion can be a tag,
too.
Human communication is an
odd-looking triangle with each side of a differing length. Thirty-eight percent
of our meaning is conveyed by our tone, fifty five percent by our body language,
and the remaining seven percent by our choice of words. For instance; The
accused felon sat down in the chair across from Inspector Vinton, is far less
meaningful than; The robbery suspect flopped into the worn wooden chair across
from a scowling Inspector Vinton. The key to producing more meaning in tag lines
is being specific.
If more than half our
meaning is left unspoken what does that leave a writer who has only his words to
convey a scene? Our writing can and will reflect a similar reality if we make an
effort to convey tone, and body language in our speaking tags.
Another problem is to
create a sense of movement in our writing. The beginning writer intuitively
realizes that his writing lacks this critical color. Unfortunately, the novice
invariably tries to remedy this by walking his character to the window to look
outside. Wouldn't it serve the reader better to march his character to the
window like a Juarez street vendor's marionette, and peek through the yellowed
lace curtains at the slush-splattered cars? This is the
trick.
The first step in thawing
a frozen scene is to consciously avoid colorless verbs such as said, walk, look,
reached, heard, followed, and turned. Take the word said as an example. There
exists a variable zoo of words that conjure up better images than this overused
verb. Raved, shouted, squealed, gasped, muttered, jeered, huffed, all convey
tone, and thus the emotion of the speaker.
If all you want to
say is "he said," then use this innocuous tag line. If, however, you
want to convey something more than the sum of words inside the quotation marks,
chose your speaking tags that echo the characters feelings.
The same is true for the
word walk. March, inched, stroll, tiptoed, limped, sashayed, and trudged all
paint more vivid visuals. Add a dash of emotion to your tag lines. It will add
texture to your menu while spicing up your writing.
1999 © Ronald Wayne Jones
Check out HARM'S WAY, a round robin story written by the Range Writers.
What interests you in the writing arena? Poetry, novel writing, short story secrets? What would you like to read about in The Emporium Gazette? Tell us and we will do our best to bring you helpful information and entertainment in the coming months. Just drop us an email at: The Emporium Gazette
A major publisher just bought your book. The royalty advance is a
number about which you've dreamt since you learned to type. Champagne is
the order of the day. You've arrived. So has a silent partner, of
sorts: the Internal Revenue Service. The purpose of this article is not
to provide writers with individual or family tax counsel, per se, but to
give writers a general overview of the major tax issues they face.
Are you putting pen to paper for profit, or is your intent more
avocation and recreation than vocation? Only if you are "actively
engaged in a trade or business"---doing the things you do as a writer
with the expressed purpose and intent of making a profit---can you deduct
your "ordinary and necessary" business expenses. If your writing is a
hobby, you still have to report the income, but you aren't entitled to
any of the deductions.
Naturally, the burden of proof that you're actively conducting a trade
or business rests on you. One way is to show a tax profit (more income
than expenses) in at least three of every five years. You can also meet
the burden by taking definitive actions that substantiate your
expectations about earning income. For example, if you don't have an
agent, actively search for one. Retain copies of all your query letters
and correspondence, including e-mail. Obtain an employer identification
number from the IRS, even if you have no intention of hiring any
employees (use IRS Form SS-4). Actively market your work. Write a
business plan. These and related actions will help you prove you are
"actively engaged in a trade or business".
How should you organize your tax business? You may think of yourself as
an artist, but the IRS considers your writing a business and expects you
to conduct your record-keeping and tax reporting responsibilities in a
businesslike manner. Generally speaking, I recommend that new writers
start off as sole proprietors. It costs nothing to set up, and it is the
easiest and least complex tax reporting vehicle: Schedule C, which flows
right into your Form 1040.
Alternatively, you can form either a subchapter S corporation or a
regular "C" corporation. Both have advantages and disadvantages the
details of which are too complex for the scope of this article. Suffice
it to say that a corporation would provide you a certain measure of
protection in terms of liability, but you'd incur set-up costs and would
have to prepare and file corporate income tax returns for the IRS and,
perhaps, the state in which you live. Because corporations are more
formal entities, you'd also have to contend with shareholder meetings,
corporate minutes, etc.
Generally speaking, you can deduct only "ordinary and necessary"
expenses for the production of income. Ordinary means common and
accepted, and necessary is defined as appropriate and helpful. You can
find those deductions in the appropriate section of Schedule C
Like many small business owners, writers tend to use some things partly
for business and partly for personal use. Costs pertaining to items like
your computer, car, telephone and even your house are good examples of
expenses you can allocate between personal and business use.
One of the more underused deductions is for a home office (IRS Form
8829). This deduction used to be very difficult for which to qualify,
but Congress heard the people's hue and cry and liberalized it somewhat
for 1999. If you have a room or even part of a room used "exclusively
and regularly" for your writing business, you may qualify to deduct a
portion of expenses pertaining to that area. Your home office must be
your "principal place of business" or, beginning in 1999, you must at
least use it to perform the administrative and support functions for your
business. This isn't a problem for most writers who commandeer a spare
bedroom or a corner of a sizeable family room. Because of the
complexities and restrictions concerning the home office deduction, you
would be well advised to consult a tax advisor.
Travel and entertainment are deductions that catch many writers' eyes.
To be deductible, travel must be away from your tax home (generally, your
house or domicile).
Entertainment is an abused area, so the substantiation requirements are
tighter. Also, you may only deduct 50% of entertainment expenses,
including meals. The key with entertainment is your expectation of a
business result. Is this a lunch with your best friend whom you hope
will buy a copy of your book, or are you spending the money to take this
new agent to lunch with the expectation of securing her to represent your
next book?
To be deductible, entertainment expenses must be either directly related
to or associated with your writing business. An example of the "directly
related to" expense would be a meal organized for the specific business
purpose of closing a new publishing deal or landing that new agent.
Expenses "associated with" your business refer to the kind of situation
in which, for example, you might meet with a prospective new agent either
before or after a meal. What is the business expectation during the
combined time of the meeting and the meal?
To substantiate entertainment deductions, you must record five things:
the amount of the expense, the date, the place the expense occurred, the
business purpose and the business relationship to your guest. Although
you don't have to keep a receipt for an expense under $25, the best
practice is to get and keep a receipt for every entertainment expense and
then write on the back of the receipt whatever is required but not
provided by the vendor on the front.
If you buy a computer and use it, say, 75% of the time for your writing
business, then, subject to certain limitations, you can probably write
off 75% of the machine's total cost as a Section 179 deduction.
Alternatively, you could depreciate or spread out the deduction of 75% of
its total cost over the equipment's useful life. Section 179 deductions
and depreciation are handled on Form 4562.
The best advice is to keep very thorough, written records. These would
be the foundations on which you would substantiate your claims under
audit.
I highly recommend that you visit the IRS' website: www.irs.gov. There
you will find a wealth of information, including forms, publications and
instructions you can download and print. Most of the forms are even
usable for filing. All the forms mentioned in this article are on the
IRS' website.
This article barely scratches the surface of this complex yet very
important subject for writers. You work very hard to earn those
royalties. The more familiar you are with how they're taxed and the
myriad of ways to reduce that burden, the more of those dollars you will
keep.
1999 © James G. Rogers
I still remember the day I found my wife. Well, she wasn't my
wife, then. I was a widower with a seven-year-old son at the time.
There was a loud thump and the sounds of miscellaneous items
rattling across the floor. The noise came from my son's bedroom and I
immediately dashed there, fearing he had fallen out of the bed.
When I flicked on the overhead light, she lay sprawled before
me. A strange woman sat on the floor, her back flattened against a
chest of drawers, obviously trying to focus. I got the impression
that she had literally knocked herself silly.
"Who are you?" I asked while taking note that my son was still
asleep, the knuckles on his right hand slightly reddened.
"I." she said then stopped. "I don't know?"
"All right then," I quipped. "How did you get in here?"
She shrugged and scanned the room.
Her flimsy dress revealed exquisite ivory-hued shoulders, and her
dark, curly tresses framed a delicate, pale face. Her enormous emerald
eyes drew me ever closer.
She looked lost and I softened when I saw the darkening bruise
above her cheek.
"What happened?" I bent to help her.
"I don't know." Her voice was the sound of a flute and cymbal,
tinkling and melodic. "Who are you?"
"I'm the owner of this house," I gently brushed her cheek. "This
is my son's bedroom." I wasn't about to give up. A strange lady in
my son's bedroom wasn't an everyday occurrence. With my assistance,
she stood and I guided her to the living room.
We were married a few weeks later. She brought me something I'd
not felt for many years; the surrealistic feeling of accomplishment.
In return, I gave her stability to a flighty, casual approach to life.
That was over forty-five years ago.
During that time Amarith became a dentist, a damn good one. She
had this uncanny ability to extract teeth and children loved her. It
was a perfect match, giving joy to both.
It shouldn't be a surprise to you when I reveal that my wife
never aged. I mean, she appeared older, more mature; of course, But
she wasn't. It was makeup.
Of course, I had tricked Amarith. She couldn't leave me. Even
now, she waits.
I'm laying on my deathbed. In my hand is the one thing that
Amarith needs and wants. In my last gesture of love to her, I'll
place it beneath my pillow.
For, you see, my son hit her in his sleep when she attempted to
retrieve the lost tooth from beneath his pillow. I took the tooth and
gave him a quarter. He never knew. But not everyone gets to meet the
tooth fairy, let alone marries her.
The tooth I've kept hidden all these years is now beneath my pillow. Amarith will take it
and leave tonight.
1999 © Robert Nailor
A few months ago, a co-worker came running into my office in a panic, her
arms flailing wildly. "Oh my ga-wd, you just have to come see this!" I
leapt up and quickly followed to see what was causing this incredible
uproar. When we arrived at her computer, there was a small, pop-up window
bearing her name and the comment, "…is a big jerk!"
I couldn't help but smile. I'd heard about that particular virus, named
"W97M.Class", but it was the first time that I'd actually seen it in
action. Thankfully, it was one of the more innocuous strains. The virus
only hurls occasional insults, and attaches itself to the odd Microsoft
Word file.
There are countless other viruses out in the wild, though, that are much
more harmful - especially to writers. In a world where the heart and soul
of the writer's story are committed to the cold, hard drive of their
computer, a virus can be allowed no quarter. Files can be corrupted or
lost altogether, often without the writer's knowledge or intervention. If
you're struggling to meet a deadline that's approaching much too quickly,
just imagine being set back to square one because a virus destroyed your
files.
It is hard to pin down just what these electronic beasties actually are,
and in fact, there is no clear-cut definition. In all cases, though, a
computer virus is a block of executable computer code. It might be a
stand-alone program, or could ride along in another file to be executed
when that file is opened. Many viruses attempt to attach themselves to
other files to reproduce. For a computer virus to achieve its ultimate
goal, though, it has to make its presence known - that is what drives the
virus authors to continue to create them. Some computer viruses are
incredibly destructive: secretly adding malicious verbage to documents,
corrupting or deleting entire files, even destroying the boot records of
disks so that a computer can no longer be started.
Several general categories of computer virus exist, and they all vary
greatly with their particular programming.
A Polymorphic Virus is one that multiplies with each instance being
slightly different, to make it more difficult for virus scanners to detect.
Trojan Horse Viruses appear to be doing one thing, while in reality are
performing a more destructive task without the computer user's knowledge.
A recent Trojan Horse displayed a small, graphic fireworks display in a
pop-up window, while it was really searching the computer user's email
directory and preparing to send copies of itself out to other unsuspecting
users.
A Stealth Virus is one that, while performing whatever purpose it was
written for, also has the ability to hide from virus scanners. For
example, a stealth boot virus intercepts attempts to view the disk sector
where it resides, and instead presents a copy of the disk sector as it
looked prior to infection.
A Worm Virus multiplies, but does not need to attach to particular files to
propagate itself. When a Worm Virus has been executed, it performs the
functions programmed by its designer, but also seeks to infect other
systems by copying its code to them.
You may also hear about Zoo Viruses, which are those that have been written
for the sole purpose of studying the properties and prevention of viruses.
Occasionally one of these Zoo Viruses will escape into the wild and infect
user machines, but it is rare.
To make matters worse, there are many hoaxes that people are warned about
daily, usually through emails. One example of this is the "Happy Times"
virus, that gained notoriety over the Internet as people spread the word
"Quick - tell everyone that you know! If you receive an email with the
subject Good Times, don't open it!" Quite honestly, sometimes it is hard
to determine which ones are real, and which are only urban legends.
There is a simple answer to all of these: invest in a reputable
virus-scanning program. Some of the more popular (and powerful) packages
are made by Norton, McAffee, and Microsoft. Monthly updates are available
over the web that allow users to download new virus signatures, so that the
virus scanner is always ready to search for the latest identified problems.
In every single case, a computer user has to allow an infected file onto
the computer, then somehow activate it. The file can arrive by downloading
it from the Internet, receiving a file attached to an email, or by loading
a file from disk or CD-ROM onto your computer. The most horrendous virus
in the world can be on your hard drive, though, and unless that file is
executed (or opened), it cannot hurt the computer.
After you purchase your Virus Scanner, immediately log onto the Internet
and use its update function to make it current. In Norton Anti-Virus, for
example, there is a "Live Update" button - once clicked, it will extract
the update files from their website, automatically add the new virus
signatures to the program on your computer, and even suggest actions that
you should take. Finally, follow the instructions to configure your new
virus scanner to examine all incoming files, as well as performing a weekly
routine scan of your computer.
Not only will this allow you to have the peace of mind that your computer
is free of viruses, but once your system has been cleaned of any infection,
the virus scanner will continue to do its job. It will examine anything
that is received via email, files that are downloaded over the Internet,
and even the boot record of your computer's disk each time that you start
your computer. Doing this is your best line of defense, and as writers use
the Internet to interact more and more, is the electronic equivalent of
safe sex.
Once you have this defense in place, if you miss your deadline with your
publisher, you won't be able to blame a computer virus - you may very well
relegated to the old excuse of "my dog ate my manuscript…" You will,
however, feel secure in the knowledge that the story you've labored over
for so long is safe, and will not fall prey to the myriad of computer
viruses that running loose in the wilds of the computer world.
Ron Jones--Talent Editor--Fiction/West Coast If you would like to subscribe to The Emporium Gazette and receive it via email, please visit the Lapis Room where you can sign up. Also, please feel free to drop us an email, should you prefer that method.
We would like to thank all of our friends--subscribers and contributors alike--for making this newsletter possible.
No part of The Emporium Gazette may be reproduced without written permission from the authors.
Ronald Wayne Jones has
authored several novels in different genres along with numerous short
stories that he is currently marketing. If you have questions or comments,
on this article, Ron can be reached at The Rhino Den. He is also the
Gazette's West Coast Talent Editor and is seeking short story submissions
for the Gazette.
James G. Rogers is a certified accountant licensed in
Pennsylvania. A veteran of 25 years, he has clients in a host of other
states as well as the United Kingdom. No stranger to writing, Rogers
also has four manuscripts for novels to his credit. His first book,
CAPITOL CHILL, which is under the pen name James Gardiner, will be
available this summer on Amazon.com. His e-mail address is JGRogers@juno.com
.
Robert Nailor is the author of CELTIC FANTASY, a blend of today's reality with the fantasy folklore of Ireland.
READ the first chapter of FLYING TO THE LIGHT, a novel by Elyse Salpeter in the Emporium's Flying Room.
DONT'T forget to check out Denise Vitola's latest novel from Putname/ACE--THE RED SKY FILE. On Sale Now in Bookstores Everywhere!
SAFE-SEX IN THE COMPUTER WORLD
1999 © Mitchel Whitington
Mitchel Whitington is the author of Uncle Bubba's Chicken Wing Fling, an amusing look at small-town life in Texas and Uncle Bubba's unstoppable quest to open a chicken wnig restaurant.
The EMPORIUM GAZETTE is accepting submissions. Payment is a writing credit/byline and an opportunity to work with an editor. Articles should be 500 to 750 words in length; short fiction should be 1000 to 1300 words. Please email your submissions to the folks listed below.
Bob Nailor--Poetry Editor
Elyse Salpeter--Talent Editor--Editor/East Coast
Mitchel Whitington--Non-Fiction Editor
&
Denise Vitola--Editor-in-Chief
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